“…no man would ever roll a suitcase because it was simply “unmanly” to do so.” – The Guardian, June 24, 2021

Yeah… I remember reading this when I was a teenager and it stuck with me for almost 30 freaking years! The crazy thing is that I have no idea even WHY that stuck with me. Who the hell WANTS to carry luggage when rolling it is so much smarter and easier! Even after countless flights, that little voice was stuck in my head repeating itself over and over again. Completely illogical and a good example of how stupid we can all be at times. 

Breaking down the lies of my youth with a lovely rose-gold carry-on with wheels.

I am happy to say that today my carry-on has wheels on the bottom, making my life a lot easier. If only it was self-propelled and rideable. With that ridiculousness out of the way, here’s an even more pressing matter:

Layovers. The dreaded layovers.

Layovers in airports are one of most confusing of experiences you can experience:

• hungry… but NOT hungry.
• Tired… but NOT tired.
• Bored… but NOT bored.
• Excited… but NOT excited.

It is the literal purgatory for the traveller.

Layovers: Purgatory for the traveller. Abandon all hope ye who enter here.

This isn’t to say that amazing experiences can’t or don’t happen while spending time in the airports. The experience is what you make of it, the ultimate test of pessimism and optimism. But I can’t think of a person that looks FORWARD to spending their time in layover… or worse… being DELAYED for hours or minutes! If you ever want to experience a time vortex… have an airline delay their flights and then passive aggressively shrug you off.

In the cases of being delayed, it isn’t the delay itself that is the problem. It is the literal uncertainty of the experience. How long will it be? Will it actually happen? Are we leaving or staying? Can I even have a pee… or more importantly a beer?! Trying to get any sort of meaningful answer is about as simple as getting approval from a parent that is at that moment disappointed in you. It is also just as essential to your sanity to hear.

In all cases of delays, it is an example to how life operates:

• It’s never quite what you want, but never as bad as you may think. 
• The best part is yet to come and will wash away the pains of the present day. 
• Even if it seems to be taking you forever to get to your destination, don’t freak out… just be calm for one more minute… you’re going to get there.
• And finally, everything is going to work out, just not always on your schedule.

To sum it all up… be sure to buy good wheeled luggage… be sure to bring something you can use to express your creativity while being delayed for hours… and get some over-priced food. Nobody should be sitting in an airport and hangry.